A New Column: DAIS NAID (said: "DAY-IS NAY-ID")

Or in other words, Do As I Say, Not As I Do. This is where I get to share moments of sheer stupidity (bad word, Mommy!) with you. It's where I get to impart some little tidbits that I have become wiser about simply by life experience...those moments when you just go ahead and act in your "mom" role, without really thinking things through first.

Here's today's tidbit:

You may, in one of your "I am woman, hear me roar" moments as a mom of multiples, feel that you can conquer the supermarket with a tandem stroller. And, yes, you most certainly can--IF you only need milk (which of course you need) and bread. I, however, thought I could pull off a small shopping list with twins and tandem stroller in tow.

Results: YES! Those strollers--particularly the front-to-back type vs. the side-by-side kind--DO provide quite a bit of grocery-loading room in the bottom storage compartment. BUT--here's the rub--once you check out and the once-dispersed products are neatly bagged, they take on a new "cube". And what do you know? They no longer fit--AT ALL--in your lovely tandem stroller.

If you are shopping in the southern region of the country, this will most likely not be a huge issue, as many supermarkets there have staff that will gladly assist you to your car. And, as it is de rigeur there, no one will be the wiser and you will be spared the embarrassment. Not so in the Northeast. In many instances you will have to either seek out help, or UNBAG your items so you can then rearrange them back in the under-baby storage compartment.

Better to try this shopping method at Costco or some other bulk-shopping place. Though, of course then you'll only be able to purchase one or two items anyway as no more will fit. Best idea: hire a babysitter, take the van, and get a real shopping cart!

Books that won't Bore! (Volume I)

While I love the classics (think Dr. Seuss) for kids and am a firm believer in reading, reading, reading to your kids, I have to admit to the read a page, skip a few paragraphs, turn the page (or two) method of reading, which of course only works until your child can a) actually notice sight words in the text or b) knows the story plot line and/or cadence by heart.

But over the years, family and friends and a few lost trips to Barnes & Noble have provided me with some great keep-a-Mom's-interest reads. A few of which I'll note here:

1. Tidy Heidi. By John Patience. A really cute story about a pig who's overly concerned with primping, then learns how to get down 'n dirty. Many thanks to Helen for that one!

2. The Todd Parr books. Simple, quick reads with colorful, graphic illustrations with some really wonderful messages (e.g., "it's ok to be different").

3. Mary Had a Little Jam. By Bruce Lansky. Classic nursery rhymes with a new twist. Even though toddlers won't necessarily get the play on words, they'll still laugh at these versions!

4. Once Upon a Time, the End. By Geoffrey Kloske and Barry Blitt. Think classic fairy tales if Cliff Notes got their hands on them. It's the super condensed but still on point version of your favorites--each story fits on one, single page.

5. You Read to Me, I'll Read to You. By Mary Ann Hoberman. This series has won awards and made the NY Times Bestseller list. And it falls into the category of "why didn't someone think of this sooner?!" For when your child is learning to read for him/herself. Your-turn/my-turn paragraphs in alternating colors cue you and your child into who-reads-when. Engages both of you big-time and it's definitely a lot of fun all-around!

That's it for now--but these are definitely worth a look. More to come in Volume II...

The Next Generation of Dry-Erase...

Here's something someone should have thought of long ago!

If you're a parent of a child over the age of 2 or 3, you then most likely know the benefit of products such as write-on/wipe-off mats or the ubiquitous Color Wonder series from Crayola (http://www.crayola.com/).

Now, however, we can welcome products by the Board Dudes to this realm of "thank the dear, sweet Lord someone came up with this" ideas. Check out http://www.boarddudes.com/ for their complete line.

But there's also a simpler route: visit your local Staples store. It was there that I found some of their great (and educational!) dry-erase mats for learning cursive writing, doing ABC's, doodling, playing hangman.... They also have some great high-school- and college-kid things (for lockers, etc.): foam boards, message boards, locks, organizers...

For the rest of us, they have weekly organizers, cork boards, magnetic boards--all worth a look. One of my faves is their Seagrass bulletin board--for when you're tired of looking at cork!

So my thoughts veer today from the ho-ho-ho-holidays to...potty training. Yes. About as non-cupful-of-cheer as you can get. But necessary none-the-less. And here's the thing. There's a whole group of product marketers out there who are trying to get inside your toddler's brain to find that one gem that'll make the process easier. What follows here is a list of some of those gems. Most I haven't tried, and many have made the list simply out of my own disbelief that they even exist...
1. The Peter Potty. Yes, a urinal for the toddler set. See it at www.peterpotty.com

2. Toilet Targets. (I have these--they get more laughter than actual pee-pee) Turn pee-pee time into sport! Available at www.pottytrainingconcepts.com

3. Potty Mitts. Mittens for little ones so you don't have to keep saying "don't touch anything!"; also available at www.pottytrainingconcepts.com

4. Inflate-A-Potty. Lest you be caught potty-less on the road! At www.onestepahead.com

5. Potty Watch. Skip setting the timer--now your little one can wear a watch whose sole purpose is to beep potty reminders. At www.onestepahead.com

6. Folding Potty Seat with Handles. (yes, I have this one) A great lifesaver to convert any toilet to a potty while you're out and about. At www.onestepahead.com

7. Family Seat Potty Seat. For those of you who find it too tiresome to use a removeable potty seat. At www.onestepahead.com

8. Cottonelle for Kids Toilet Paper. Yes, follow the paw-prints to know just how much toilet paper to use (how did we ever survive without it?!?). Available at most supermarkets.

I'm sure there are others I could add to the list. But I just never realized how much of an industry going to the bathroom has become.

Completely Hassle-Free Holiday Shopping... with Benefits!

I'm one of those people who, given the opportunity, will make a competition out of just about anything--even when there's no one to compete with but myself. It keeps things interesting. Example: think I can't fix that broken towel rack? Watch me! (all said in conversation to myself)

So now that the holidays are upon us--although it is a tad bit late for those of you who are the more conventional brick & mortar shoppers--here's a little challenge I typically put myself up to: shop for everyone on my list (usually 15+ folks--not including those (ugh!) obligatory work/school/childcare gifts) in 24 hours or less without leaving home! If you really know me, you know this is no challenge at all. Why? Because a) I let my fingers do the walking on my keyboard at the speed of light; and b) I belong to www.upromise.com;

Upromise has been a great little "friend with benefits" for saving for my kids' education. The beauty of it is, you shop online just as you would normally, and automatically (provided you shop via the Upromise site/links) a percentage, from 1% to 10% or more of your purchase, is dumped into your Upromise account. It sits there and collects until you either have it electronically transferred to a 529 account, or you withdraw it via snail mail check to deposit into an account that's not directly linked to Upromise. (check out the site for the specifics...)

And here's some other Upromise perks... Your everyday purchases (groceries, gas, restaurants, etc) may be eligible for savings--provided you register your grocery store savings card, your gas credit card, and your primary credit card numbers, it's all automatic and you can track how your purchases are adding up to savings online. You can also have your family and friends register and have their purchases benefit your little ones' futures. Not bad.
I've been a member since before my first was born (yes! you can register your child in utero!!) and now the "deposits" keep coming on auto-pilot...

Oh, and yes, my shopping's done. No malls, no parking hassles, no food courts. I'm just sitting back sipping my coffee and waiting for the boxes to arrive via my UPS guy....

The Child Care Catch-22

So you want (no, NEED) to work if you & your family plan to continue living in a major metro area. But whoa! Not so fast there! At least not if "family" takes in "child" or, heaven forbid, "children". What will you do with your kids? I find it humorous that most daycare/childcare/preschool programs close for the day anywhere between 5:30 p.m. and 6:30 p.m., considering that if you commute to work, there is no feasible way you will ever leave work at 5:00 p.m. (assuming you can leave then) and arrive to pick up your child on time. I can recall stories of my sister racing to pick up my niece from school only to be fined by-the-minute and threatened with explusion! It's a universal problem and if anyone out there has some solutions to this quandry...please share with the rest of us. In the interim, here are some thoughts...
Check out www.christineadlercare.com. Christine Adler's made Start-Up Nation's Top 100 Home-Based business list for 2007; I haven't used her services, but I have to imagine she's got competition nation-wide, and in a pinch, sounds like she's onto something good (she & her colleagues can even be booked for errands!). Try keywords like "mommy's helper" or "concierge + child care" on a Google search to see what's available in your area.
Plenty of Nanny sites out there as well--but I've found word-of-mouth the best source for nanny referrals, nanny agencies, nanny dirt--yes, dirt--the lowdown on who's around, who's good, who's a slacker, who you can count on and the going rates.
The good thing for multiples, is that you certainly separate out the wheat from the chaff. You will get nannies who will avoid you like the plague once they learn you have twins (ditto with babysitters). Only a serious (or completely naive) nanny will take on twins. You'll know in a second if she's clueless about double-duty. Another good thing (am I channeling Martha Stewart now?) about twins is that if you go with a more formalized care situation (eg, preschool), you most likely will get the 10-15% discount on enrolling a sibling...hey, at least it's something!

Here's another thing: Holiday Decorating with the little ones...

Not sure how you're going to manage bringing out all those fine, glass ornaments and family heirlooms to decorate for the holidays? One word: DON'T. Don't do it. You will not reap any benefit whatsoever by doing so. So what to do? Solution: PLASTICS! Yes, at first glance I thought I was crazy myself to be typing that. But those folks in The Graduate were onto something big...plastics do equate success for the Parents of Twin Boys (PTBs, from now on).

I realized that K-Mart (YES! K-MART) has these wonderfully cheap yet wonderfully rich-looking plastic (plastic!) ornaments in rich jewel-tone colors w/a nice matte sheen finish. And they come in orbs of several sizes so you can let your inner design sense loose to play. They're not only great for hanging on the tree--but if you dare, they're also great for displaying in large clear glass vases. You can bounce them, throw them, sit on them--nothing happens to them! Voila! Yes, you can decorate and seem like an adult sans children--you just need the right stuff!

Opt for ribbons for your tree-topper (put that angel away! Immediately!)--a nice large bow will do the trick, whether you put it together yourself or buy one--and it'll last through all those years of infancy, toddlerhood, precociousness. Little bows strategically placed on the branches add a glimmer of luster (with metallics of gold or silver) or a rich glow of color (with deep, vibrant red or maroon shades) that'll take your tree from Charlie Brown Christmas to White House Christmas in almost an instant. Well, sort of. But give it a try--it's a surefire way to a stress-less holiday!

PS--if you do this, why not go through those "better" ornaments before you pack them away for a few years. Chances are, you're not intending on using them ALL again anyway...

how supersister came to be...

8:12 this morning. Upon pressing my 6-yr old to hurry up for school, she responds: "I'm not Super-Sister, you know!!" Very indignant of her. But it stuck with me. She, she's a sister to twin 3-yr old boys. Not an easy task. And so, as I've come to see life through eyes that only a mom of twins can, I realize there is just so little "good"--no, really good, content out there to help those who find themselves blessed with multiples. And here I am.

This morning's tip is easy and straightforward. It may sound simplistic, and against the more frugal-minded New England mindset of how to raise children, but here goes... When you find a toy (or other objet du desir) BUY ONE FOR EACH CHILD. Excessive? Perhaps. Forestalling the "learn to share" lesson? Yes, but only briefly. As they grow and learn to have their own interests, miraculously they don't tug after the same items. They're also getting out of that purely id-driven mindset and can start to comprehend the concept of sharing. But till then, (ie, till they are at least 3, more toward 4 years of age) the "Buy 2+, Get Your Sanity Free!" method will work wonders. Trust me on this one. It's ok. And tell those "a penny saved is a penny earned" mothers at your kiddie play group that, in this instance, a penny spent is dollars saved in therapy, marriage counseling, and emergency room bills.